Family Counseling Fort Smith AR

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Craig Cox
(501) 783-5353
Fort Smith, AR
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Corrections/Offenders, Couples & Family, School, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Back To Basics
(479) 719-7051
1122 S Waldron Rd Ste C
Fort Smith, AR
 
Guidance Center
(479) 452-6650
3111 S 70th St
Fort Smith, AR
 
Caplinger Law Firm
(479) 784-9969
115 N 10th St Ste A108
Fort Smith, AR
 
Behavioral Science Clinic
(479) 478-0211
211 N Greenwood Ave Ste B
Fort Smith, AR
 
T Polinskey
(479) 783-7931
Fort Smith, AR
Practice Areas
Clinical Mental Health, Counselor Education, Aging/Gerontological, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Gerontological Counselor, Certified Clinical Mental Health Counselor, National Certified Counselor

Answers For Youth & Families
(479) 452-7792
5111 Rogers Ave
Fort Smith, AR
 
Law Office Of J F Atkinson Jr
(479) 782-6400
423 Rogers Ave
Fort Smith, AR
 
Destiny House
(479) 242-2480
800 N 19th St
Fort Smith, AR
 
Dianne Baer Counseling Llc
(479) 709-9779
108 N 18th St
Fort Smith, AR
 

Is the Role You Play in Your Family Hurting Your Life?

Every living system seeks balance. In nature, this process is called homeostasis. Within a family system, homeostasis explains why members adopt certain roles. In healthy families, members take on different roles at various times to meet the family’s needs. But in dysfunctional families, the roles are more rigid. For example, if one parent is addicted to alcohol, the other may be busy providing for the family and seldom home. One child may take on the role of Caretaker, preparing meals for younger siblings while another becomes the Hero—the one who strives to do everything perfectly.

But the family dynamics that shape family roles aren’t limited to severe dysfunctions like substance abuse. One of my coaching clients grew up in a loving, close-knit family in which he was the Hero. Because his parents wanted him to have opportunities they never had, he was expected to get straight A’s, a good education, and a successful career. And while this role enabled him to become an accomplished and wealthy lawyer, his life was falling apart. High blood pressure was causing health problems, workaholism threatened his marriage, and the responsibilities of providing for his elderly parents, an expensive home, and three children in private schools overwhelmed him.

Another example is Casey, who dreamed of becoming a professional photographer. Casey was in a financial-services job she hated, but in which she felt trapped. Growing up, both of her parents struggled to hold down jobs. Casey started babysitting at the age of 12, and had been helping her parents financially ever since. She lived with her boyfriend, who was supporting his ex-wife and son. He was unsupportive of her making a career change, because they needed her income to pay the bills. By continuing to make others’ needs more important than her own, she had unconsciously recreated her family role of Caretaker in her adult relationship.

While our family role may have made sense growing up, it often wreaks havoc in our adult lives. As our primary role takes hold, parts of us become suppressed—parts we need to live a healthy and fulfilling adult life. These can include the part that feels like a worthwhile, deserving person; the part that feels intelligent and competent; the spontaneous, playful part, or the part that can feel and express joy.

If the role you play is sabotaging your life, change the behaviors that reinforce it. If you play the People-pleaser who always says what others expect for app...

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