Family Counseling Fairbanks AK

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Jennifer .Danhauser
(907) 978-4978
Fairbanks, AK
Practice Areas
Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Mental Health/Agency Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

clearwater counseling
(907) 457-6002
600 3rd street Suite 200
fairbanks , AK
 
Deborra Fields
(907) 243-5130
Anchorage, AK
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Childhood & Adolescence, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill, Supervision
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Mary Ann Mattingly
(907) 522-2010
Anchorage, AK
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Aging/Gerontological, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
Certified Clinical Mental Health Counselor, National Certified Counselor

Jennifer Burkholder
(907) 360-9936
Anchorage, AK
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

David Webster
(907) 361-6059
Fort Wainwright, AK
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Noah Rubinstein
(907) 222-1308
Anchorage, AK
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Clinical Mental Health, Eating Disorders, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Hugh Fisher
(262) 338-2717
Kenai, AK
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Mental Health/Agency Counseling, Disaster Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Roseann Lynch
(907) 225-7825
Ketchikan, AK
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Mental Health/Agency Counseling
Certifications
National Certified Counselor
Language Proficiencies
ASL : American Sign Language

David Webster
(907) 361-6059
Fort Wainwright, AK
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Is the Role You Play in Your Family Hurting Your Life?

Every living system seeks balance. In nature, this process is called homeostasis. Within a family system, homeostasis explains why members adopt certain roles. In healthy families, members take on different roles at various times to meet the family’s needs. But in dysfunctional families, the roles are more rigid. For example, if one parent is addicted to alcohol, the other may be busy providing for the family and seldom home. One child may take on the role of Caretaker, preparing meals for younger siblings while another becomes the Hero—the one who strives to do everything perfectly.

But the family dynamics that shape family roles aren’t limited to severe dysfunctions like substance abuse. One of my coaching clients grew up in a loving, close-knit family in which he was the Hero. Because his parents wanted him to have opportunities they never had, he was expected to get straight A’s, a good education, and a successful career. And while this role enabled him to become an accomplished and wealthy lawyer, his life was falling apart. High blood pressure was causing health problems, workaholism threatened his marriage, and the responsibilities of providing for his elderly parents, an expensive home, and three children in private schools overwhelmed him.

Another example is Casey, who dreamed of becoming a professional photographer. Casey was in a financial-services job she hated, but in which she felt trapped. Growing up, both of her parents struggled to hold down jobs. Casey started babysitting at the age of 12, and had been helping her parents financially ever since. She lived with her boyfriend, who was supporting his ex-wife and son. He was unsupportive of her making a career change, because they needed her income to pay the bills. By continuing to make others’ needs more important than her own, she had unconsciously recreated her family role of Caretaker in her adult relationship.

While our family role may have made sense growing up, it often wreaks havoc in our adult lives. As our primary role takes hold, parts of us become suppressed—parts we need to live a healthy and fulfilling adult life. These can include the part that feels like a worthwhile, deserving person; the part that feels intelligent and competent; the spontaneous, playful part, or the part that can feel and express joy.

If the role you play is sabotaging your life, change the behaviors that reinforce it. If you play the People-pleaser who always says what others expect for app...

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